Tuesday, January 17, 2012

The Crazy Mom Syndrome

I fear I have become a crazy mom. Crazy as in, meddles in my five year old sons "relationships" crazy. You know the mom. The mom who is always bothering the teacher and trying to dictate what goes on in the classroom or on the soccer field. The mom who is super controlling and can't let her children "fight their own fights," at least to some extent. (I understand that at times interference is necessary) Aren't there rules out there somewhere on when to meddle and when not to? If only there were a book that had every. single. different situation out there regarding what may or may not happen as your child grew up. I would definitely buy that book.  Too bad that is completely unrealistic. I just can't seem to figure it out. I worry all the time about how Aidan interacts with other children and I am constantly worried that his feelings will be hurt. Am I crazy? Is this normal? Please share your wisdom with me.

Perfect example happened this past weekend. We finally got snow here (YaY snow)...so Aidan wanted to go outside and play.  Added bonus, our neighborhood is full of boys. Twin four year old boys live behind us. An eight year old boy lives across the street. Two houses down to the left there is a five year old and a three year old. You get the picture. Boys are everywhere so there is never a shortage on playmates. However, Aidan always wants to play with the older kids and the older kids don't always want to play with him.  He will stand at the end of our driveway and scream and shout their names, only to be pretty much completely ignored, which is what happened this weekend. And it breaks me heart. I want to shout "HELLLO can you at least answer him and not ignore him?!" Then he comes running back into the house asking if he can go to "so and so's" house to play in the snow too. What do I tell him? Do I say yes go ahead even though clearly the older kids don't want to be bothered by a younger kiddo or do I try explaining that he should see if someone his own age wants to play with him instead? I don't know. This time I let him cross the street and play with the big kids...but I must have looked out our front window ohhhhhhhhhhhh every five minutes to make sure everything appeared OK. And it did. This time. BUT I know there will be a time when it won't be OK and he will be upset about something and I will have to make it better. Part of being a Momma I suppose, but it certainly doesn't make it easy. I fear I will be the mom who retaliates and makes the situation worse. I don't want to be that mom but I don't know how to let go.

Yet, I know at some point in his life he will feel left out or not good enough because unfortunately it's a part of life. We all had to experience those types of situations growing up.  Maybe what is more important is how we help our children to cope during these situations. To educate them even when its hard.  Maybe I should stop worrying about turning into the crazy mom and just let things be instead of trying to dictate everything. I just want to make sure I make the best choices in regards to my son so there is never a doubt in my mind regarding how we raised him.  Being a Momma is HARD. The hardest job in the world if you ask me. Even thought its hard, I wouldn't change it for the world. I just hope I'm doing a good job.

4 comments:

  1. First comment ever! No worries you are doing an awesome job!

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  2. Yes from time to time you can be a very... how shall i say..? A worry-wart? BUT you are an awesome mom w/3 lovely men in your household. I get the awesome pleasure of watching the 2 lil guys :)

    LOVE yo sistah!

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  3. Kristi - you are am amazing woman doing a wonderful job balancing your world - blessings are your to grab!
    Auntie Linda

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